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**john m.** · Jul 3, 2009, 10:07 PM

Re: Check this out....

Looks very good to me! Very proffessional! Only thoughts I have, is on the pricing I would rather see it all lined up instead of ex.

hand wash. $
tires. $
Interior. $

Something more like this

hand wash.....$
wax..............$
interior..........$

its easier on the eyes. Also, the bullets in the first page seem somewhat thrown in to put additional information. Maybe put what you are really emphasizing in the last sentance before them? Other than those two it looks great. Maybe have an english teacher check grammer?

Nice job though! I really like it

**ColonelCash** · Jul 3, 2009, 10:33 PM

Re: Check this out....

For your pricing, I would add a table with headings and remove the '.............' between prices. This is the page that will make or break a sale.

Also, do you use the Z-ymol wax on all wax details? It was never clear from the description. A cheaper option might be beneficial.

**Cosmin** · Jul 4, 2009, 12:53 AM

Re: Check this out....

i am new with this i may be wrong.but here is what i see so far:
- you are the guy who drive down the road see a new cool car pull over take 5-10 pictures with it jump in the car drive to the next one and so on , no detail pictures with details , no before /after pictures , is like a visit to car sale or dealer parking lot, hello u are a detailer , right?
- the services are kind of unorganized, , is a mix of numbers all over, or is just me, different taste
- your sign looks like a long horn , are u texan?
- i wouldn`t separate cars by manufacturer , i think a detailer potential is not in the brand of the car , is in the quality and ability to deal with any type of car.
good luck , over all is quality but needs adjustment, just looking on it it gives me impression that u are just an wash and wax guy , not detailer, that`s my opinion about website , don`t take it personal , or is maybe just me cause i can`t sleep and u got lucky to get a critique.
good luck

**Bedinabox** · Jul 4, 2009, 03:32 AM

Re: Check this out....

How far in advance should I schedule an appointment?
Usually an appointment should be made 3-5 days in advance to allow proper time for your detail to be executed properly. Although we may be able to fit you in on short notice.

To me this sentence seems redundant. A different approach may be

"Usually an appointment should be made 3-5 days in advance to allow adequate scheduled time; one thing we don't do is leave a job undone. Without proper scheduling you are cutting yourself short.

In your services offered...I feel like dropping the "Italian Car Makers" name is isolating a market that may be intimidated to contact such a "prestigious" detailer. If you were to say that the wax is engineered for "modern paint jobs" that may make the consumer feel more comfortable.

I wouldn't use the slang term N so much. It looks tacky and wouldn't be hard to replace with and.

The services offered prices are messy. It is confusing to have the "car" tab, "motorcycle" tab, and "trailer" tab, all go to the same place. Having a section for each option may create a cleaner look.

One thing I am working on with my own website is a shopping cart. For the services I have a solid price on, people can add it to their car. After they fill it out, the quote is sent via email. Their email address is than forwarded to you. When you receive their email address, it allows for a follow up with questions, thusly making it easier to close a sale. Moreover, you would be able to create a mailing list for people that have requested quotes and people that have already bought from you. In essence streamline your marketing process.

I love the layout and color scheme. Just little things noticed, I could be completely wrong about all I have said as well.

**Details** · Jul 4, 2009, 03:35 PM

Re: Check this out....

thanks

**Details** · Jul 5, 2009, 08:51 PM

Re: Check this out....

anyone else? Please, say something!!!!

**Fischer** · Jul 5, 2009, 09:24 PM

Re: Check this out....

I think the site is overall awesome. Its a simple site to navigate through and gets the point across. Maybe using different fonts and space out the prices. There seems to be alot of words and numbers bunched together and it can seem a bit overwhelming.

Other than that, it looks great!

**G_S_DB** · Jul 5, 2009, 10:12 PM

Re: Check this out....

OK for starters, I love the look. It is very professional and well done -- which is more than I can say about most sites.

Now to the constructive criticism:

1. The pictures on you main page are great, but I would slow then down a touch (add ~1 second) and add a slight fade (~0.5s) as a transition between them. You don't want the "snap" of the pictures be a distraction to the viewer as the read the intro paragraph.

2. I would start the intro paragraph with a positive, not negative comment about the customers you are trying to reach.

"With busy schedules most people don't have the time to take care of the second most expensive investment their cars. That's where First Class Detailing can provide busy individuals with on-site mobile detailing services."

A. Don't make assumptions about them that might not be true, they might be busy or they might not have any clue how to properly take care of their car.
B. All you are trying to do is appeal to their need for your services
C. If you decide to keep the line, at least put a comma after the word investment.

3. "Our mobile unit comes complete with spot free water, power, and top of the line products to keep your car in show room new condition."

Is spot free water a primary selling point for your customer base? I am not sure that would take space in this first paragraph to talk about stuff like water and power. Just make sure they know you are "a complete mobile solution to all your car care needs." You can quote me on that.

4. I would use more dynamic action words like: rejuvenate, recondition, protect, restore, beautify. Something along those lines.

5. Wordsmithing suggestions...
• Tampa Bay Mobile Service
• State of the Art Equipment
• High End Car Specialist = Specializing in high-end exotic and luxury cars
• Quality Chemicals and Products = Quality care products (ditch the chemical word, it sounds too industrial)
• Odor Removal Specialist
• Excellent Customer Service
• Executive Hand Washing
• Variety of Detail Packages = Custom detail packages available

6. "Our mobile units service the Tampa bay area appointment's available on short notice."

Remember the punctuation = “Our mobile units service the Tampa bay area; appointments are available for quick deliveries." You don’t want to make it sounds like they can give YOU short notice, but that appointments won’t necessarily be scheduled weeks or months into the future.

7. I think you have already gotten some good comments on the Services page, but I would definitely make good use of tables. It will give you a very even and uniform look that will clean that page right up. Also, use the dash ( - ) to separate your price ranges. I also agree with the comment to not use the “n” in place of and. Also, I have now idea what you mean by "buff" as part of your wax n buff package. Is that paint cleaning, or defect removal?

8. Make your FAQ page in some sort of order, either by category or alphabetical.

9. Get rid of the file names on your gallery sub pages.

10. Hide the testimonials page until you have some.

I hope these are helpful comments, but please remember that free advice is worth exactly what you paid for it… nothing.

**tigersharkdude** · Jul 6, 2009, 04:13 PM

Re: Check this out....

I am a grammer nazi so,

1. first page, first sentence
With busy schedules most people don't have the time to take care of thesecond most expensive investment, their cars.

2.Our mobile unit comes complete with : spot free water, power, and top of the line products(added the colon)

**tigersharkdude** · Jul 6, 2009, 04:14 PM

Re: Check this out....

Dont worry about the colon in number 2, I didnt notice the sentence was so long

3.
Automobile Detailing
Cars: S.U.V.'s, Trucks, and Minivans:
Full Service Wash: $30
Exterior Wash n Wax: $45-$55
Full Service Wash n Wax: $60-$75
Complete Interior Steam Clean: $60-$75
Full Service Wash n Interior Steam Clean: $75-$90
Full Service Wash Wax n Steam Clean: $120-$135
Complete Exterior Detail: $120-$135
Complete Exterior Detail n Interior Wipedown: $135-$150
Full Service Detail: $180-$200

I would do the same thing for all of the other services on the page as well

**Details** · Jul 6, 2009, 09:17 PM

Re: Check this out....

thank you all soo much!!! I need all the advice possible

**c5rick** · Jul 9, 2009, 03:51 PM

Re: Check this out....

From a neighbor just south, I thought the pricing layout was confusing.
AXEL NY made some comments and I checked out his site and thought his pricing page was spot on

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