i made a website

[nabisco shine]

hey guys tell me what you think im not done at all any inputs im not showing it to the outside world untill its done

[Michael Stoops]

Re: i made a website

And the URL is...........

[nabisco shine]

Re: i made a website

O SORRY www.jasonsdetailing.weebly.com tell me what you think

[nabisco shine]

Re: i made a website

its not done im still working on it

[CieraSL]

Re: i made a website

Well, I'll just say what I think. On your home page, you really need to sell yourself more. OK, so you can be mobile, you use high end products, you listed some of the things you can do, but it just didn't leave me feeling strongly like I should choose you over somebody else. Since the home page is the first page customers will see, it needs to be the page that really stands out. Under Showcase, would have appreciated some bigger pictures. Under Prices, you have "Interior and Exterior detail included" under Full Detail, but you don't have an Interior package listed. As a potential customer, I have no idea what an interior package entails, so you might want to add that. The About Me part just plain needs help. The whole thing is a run-on and you didn't finish the sentence. Break it up into several sentences. So instead of:

hi my name is jason and i am a private detailer i do this on my days off and i just love making cars shine its like an obsession im always finding something to make my truck or car shine my friends and family say im crazy lol ive been detailing for a year and all my profit goes to my house trying to make it in this world other then that i work at resort as my full time job and

you might make it something like:

Hi, my name is Jason and I am a hobbyist detailer. I do this on my days off because I just love making cars shine - it's like an obsession with me. I'm always finding something new to add to my detailing arsenal. My friends and family say I'm car crazy, and that's probably true. I've been detailing for about a year and I really enjoy it.

Then add something to it. I don't really see the need for that last sentence, the part about how the money goes toward your house and how you work at a resort full time - one would assume you are doing this to make money for yourself - it is irrelevant where the money goes. Anyway, that's what I saw. Hope that helps!

[nabisco shine]

Re: i made a website

ok thanks yes i will fix that i am still learning and i need all the help im looking for please let me know more input what you guys think keep it coming i wont take it in the wrong way thanks guys

[SVT Lightning]

Re: i made a website

I'm not a lawyer but I was wondering if it's legal for you to use the name "nabisco" on your web-site?

[nabisco shine]

Re: i made a website

i use that cause everyone likes to call me that but if it is ill change it

[Matt Majeika]

Re: i made a website

One thing that popped out to me:

When I go online to check out someone's work, I don't want to see just thumbnails - I want nice quality pictures that really highlight their work and really show off their capabilities. Be sure to include before/after pictures wherever possible.

Great start!

[nabisco shine]

Re: i made a website

thank you from now im gonna do a before pic

[Shawn T.]

Re: i made a website

In addition, in the intro you say "portal cable" when it is a porter-cable.

You also listed M80 Speed Glaze twice in a row.

Overall, pretty good. I like the way you make it personal so that people can get a feel for who you are, not only what you do. Personality can be a governing factor in determining who to do business with.

I would also list the description of each product found on the Meguiars website next to each item.

Overall, looks like your heading in the right direction! Good Luck!

[nabisco shine]

Re: i made a website

oh man thanks cooper i will change that

[Brook]

Re: i made a website

Where Porter-Cable is a brand name it should also be capitalized.

[ClearlyCoated]

Re: i made a website

Think of your website as your resume. Avoid passive verbs and replace them with action verbs

Thank you for visiting my site. You can check out pictures of my work by clicking on “showcase.” I have listed the pricing along with the available package deals I offer. I use all professional high end products (compound, cleaner, polish, sealant, wax, clay, bar, etc.) along with microfiber cloths and terry cloths. I use a rotary buffer machine and a portal cable dual action for polishing and waxing. I can take out oxidation, waterspots on glass, paint swirls, and minor – medium scratches. For deep scratches that you can’t take out I can blend them in, but not remove them. Once I’m finished with your vehicle it will be smooth as glass and the paint will look brand new!

I can be mobile, so I can and will come to you. If you’d like me to come to you, please provide electricity, and water. Or you can drop your car off at my house.

Maybe something more concise and confident:

Thank you for visiting my site. Check out pictures of what I can do for you by clicking on “showcase.” Pricing and available package deals are listed. I use only professional grade, high end products (compound, cleaner, polish, sealant, wax, clay, bar, etc.) along with microfiber and terry cloths.

Professional buffing machines such as Rotary buffers and Porter-Cable Dual Action polishers are used to achieve high speed polishing, paint correction, and waxing. Paint correction services remove oxidation, waterspots on glass, paint swirls, and moderate scratches. Deeper scratches that penetrate the paint's base coat are blended and reduced. Your vehicle it will be smooth as glass and the paint will look brand new!

My services are mobile and I will come to you. Access to electricity and water will be required. Or you can drop your car off at my house.

[nabisco shine]

Re: i made a website

clearly coated that was nice! good point nice and smooth