Your not fanatic about your interior, your just CAR CRAZY like the rest of us!

From what you described it does sound a little excessive for an oil change but consider this: If they moved your car to bring it into the bay for an oil change and didn't adjust all the mirrors so they could make sure not to hit a car coming in or going out and did hit something, would you call them an idiot because they didn't do those things? It could be a liability issue from their point of view in case something like that does happen.
As for you wheel lock question, no, they don't typically have their own wheel lock wrenches. Many of these have many, many different patterns and they need to use the one that came with the wheels so they don't damage anything. If they were trying to get one off you lost the lock for, that they can do but would damage the current one in the process. Why do they need to take the wheels off to change the oil? Were they rotating the tires too?
Basically, thats why I do as much of my own work as possible. I have always changed my own oil and still do. Any other work I can do myself is done by me on all my vehicles. My Z in the avatar I stood by the service bay at a Nissan dealership for 6 hours while they did a recall on it to make sure nothing was screwed up. It's always clean, just like yours and hasn't even been washed with soap and water in 3+ years.
So, I feel your pain and what your going through. If it's a place you go for other repairs besides just changing the oil, have you tried letting them know in a nice way how you feel and ask that they take a little bit better car of your car?
I have done that also and given specific instructions and made them write things on the work order (that was the recall, DO NOT WASH MY CAR!). When my z was in the body shop for a scratch repair I stressed the importance of my car and keeping it clean, even in the engine bay since I have a lot of work done there and they did pay extra attention and while I still had some things to clean myself it was minimal.
Hope somehow the information has helps and welcome to the car crazy world!

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